I was feeling really contented and happy about life last night, and almost sat down and wrote about it, but then I was tired and thought I’d write today instead.

And then today just came down on me like a ton of bricks. Bad things all around me, people I care about sick and scared and hurt, and I don’t know what to do about any of them.
I dimly recall feeling good yesterday. It was a good week - productive at work, socializing with ex- and current coworkers, the weather finally became fall-like and I was able to bust out all my favorite fall clothes and enjoy being outside, and all was generally good with the world. It’s hard to believe that was 24 hours ago. Right now I would like to crawl under a rock and stay there for a very long time. If only one could get pizza delivered under rocks, I would.

A funny thing I’m finding, as I get older, is that I like having visual reminders around me of the people I love.  I never used to be much into hanging photographs, but the last couple of years I really like having them around me.  I am nearly out of wall space in my office at home to hang pictures, and may soon have to branch out and start taking over walls in the rest of the house.

Last night I finally hung two great paintings my little sister made when she was eight, of the cat and dog we had then, who remain my first and therefore in some ways most beloved pets.  They’re your typical silly eight-year-old paintings, full of impossible anatomy and misspelled names and birds that look like airplanes and crazy bright primary colors, including a random blue blob that I have so far been completely unable to interpret, but I’m really liking being able to look at them.  They make me think of my sister and my long-gone childhood pets all at once, and each time I look over at them they make me smile.

Just now I hung up a picture of my friend Shauna and her daughter Ava, who are having a really rough few months, and who I have been thinking about a lot this week.  I already had them on my picture wall at work, but now they are at home too, where I can take a moment out of my day whenever I’m at my computer to think of them.

As I type this, surrounded by these mementos of people I love, I have a cat on my lap, iTunes is playing a song written and performed by an old high school friend, and I am happy both enjoying my alone time and knowing that Len will be home from work any minute and I will be happy to see him.   I had a bit of a rough day, but right now I feel content and surrounded by reminders of my loved ones.  And with the crap week just past, that’s a good feeling.